194 Steps to Instant Internet Fame

Marketing should be EZ PZ. Lightning-fast! Effective! That’s why we’re giving you the best, quickest approach for instant internet fame. Let’s get started.

1. Panic because you’re not on social media yet.

2. Relax, it’ll be okay.

3. Hire a celebrity PR team.

4. They’ll love your dog.

5. Get makeovers (and a bath).

7. Take a break and play some fetch.

8. Okay, it’s time for work now.

9. Make a viral video with your dog.

10. Let a famous director lead it.

11. Include backup dancers and special effects.

12. Post it everywhere.

13. Wait. 

14. Reap the benefits of viral fame.

15. Buy your dog some treats because they helped you get this far.

16. Land a TV spot.

17. Walk the red carpet and sign some autographs.

18. You’ll have to sign for your dog.

19. Hire a chauffeur to keep up with all the fanfare.

20. Your friends only want to see your dog.

21. Get jealous of your dog.

22. Lose your friends.

23. Your dog goes on a solo tour.

24. Fire your PR team.

25. Watch your dog meet global royalty.

26. Destroy your TV in a rage.

27. Delete your social media.

28 Throw away your phone.

29. Change your name because the loss of fame will be too much.

30. Delete your social media.

31. Your dog recognizes your hard work. 

32. Fans will rejoice in your talents.

33. But you won’t have social media or a TV to hear about it.

34. You didn’t think we’d really have 194 steps to internet glory, did you?

36. Oh, you did...

37. Well, this is embarrassing.

…

193. The end. 

194. Oh, and have a good April Fools’ Day.